Ok... OK.. I KNOW! I know I said I would update this (fairly) regularly and...clearly... lately I have not. I apologize but I really do have good reasons for it!
Reason 1) I got a new job! I'm still with my agency, and actually in the same office AREA but I'm switching divisions and I'm upgrading from my cubicle world to my own office... with a door and everything! We'll work on the window thing later...
Reason 2) Tim has been blowing the Army away with his mad skills and has been in a flurry of boards. First he had to go to the "NCO (Non-commissioned Officer) of the Quarter" board for his battalion (in recruiting world, his battalion is Indianapolis--which covers all of Indiana and all of Illinois). He kicked serious butt on that board so he got sent to the NCO of the Year board for his battalion next, and again kicked butt. So they informed him with 3 days notice that he would next be sent to Fort Knox, KY for NCO of the Year for his Brigade (which covers the entire midwest). So that is where Tim left for yesterday, and where he'll be until Thursday. If he wins this one he goes to the NCO of the Year board for ALL of Army Recruiting. Kind of a big deal... and maybe I like to brag a little :)
Reason 3) I was dog-sitting for my friend Chelsea while she was in fabulous Jamaica so my week was spent in a little limbo between my house and hers in the evenings.
SO its been very hectic but I am back!
And good news! I'M OFFICIALLY IN MY SECOND TRIMESTER! YAYYYYY!!
Bet you though the pregnancy symptoms would disappear or at least ease up? ME TOO! Guess What? The little PEACH (3 in long) is still working up a flurry of excitement over here! The latest development... LACTOSE INTOLERANCE! Yes, apparently you CAN grow back into it (as I thought I got rid of this at age 5) and so goes all your dreams of ice cream induced comas and cheese-filled quesadillas. THANKS PEACH!
Now for the normal person, they would diligently cut out all lactose products from their diet, right? Well I went out and bought sherbert, and I had Tim wander the aisles of Wal-mart searching for something called SOY MILK--as he cringes as he asks the sales lady where it was. But these were the easy changes... the real hardship comes with CHEESE. Because suddenly, everything I've ever wanted to eat most in the universe, contains CHEESE. That salad I eat? Cheese. Those muffins--cheese strudel. Everything on the Taco Bell/ Qdoba menu that I crave now on an almost hourly basis--CHEESE.
Its a cruel, cruel world this little peach is coming into!
BUT hopefully I will figure out a way around this. Mostly it just gives me the most irritating heartburn and acid reflux known to man (have you ever felt like there is ground beef stuck in your throat? When I have dairy it is that feeling 24/7). Luckily Prevacid seems to help a lot (and is safe for pregnancy--thank you for the small miracles!!).
We have also realized that now that I'm in my second trimester, and able to you know, eat, I should NEVER EVER BE ALLOWED TO GO GROCERY SHOPPING ALONE EVER AGAIN for the following reasons:
1) I forget all sense of "meals" when wandering through those glorious aisles and instead pick out things that alone seem delicious, but tend to be ONE part of a normal person's meal. Let's look at strawberry jam for instance. Most people would at least buy bread with this and put it on toast, if not peanut butter also and make a sandwich. I however, had a huge urge to just take a spoon and eat the jam out of the jar. Yes, clearly that is healthy/normal.
2) I buy things that have zero nutritional value at all. My recent trip? Brownie mix, three boxes of toaster strudles, chocolate chip cookies, and jello mouse-pudding among other equally nutritious things. Please explain how my baby is craving a certain nutrition from any of that!?
3) I tend to ignore prices in search of things to satisfy said cravings. Again, witness the fact that that shopping trip to include the brownie mix and a few other items, making a total of two grocery bags, came out to be a whopping $53.00! I still have no idea how I managed to do that. Before I could get an entire week's meals for that amount--lets not even talk about how much of that brownie mix/toaster struddles/cookies are left after 3 days.
So... looking back at all this I clearly should not be left alone with a purse in a store that sells food. And as we saw earlier, Tim's idea of grocery shopping is picking up packages of Ramen noodles in mass quantities.
So little peach, thank God we have family dinners at grandma and grandpa's house on Sunday nights. Otherwise, I think you might pop out with a Taco Bell wrapper around your little body.
Monday, August 29, 2011
Friday, August 12, 2011
The one with THE CRAZY
So folks, I am FINALLY inching my way out of the first trimester and setting sail into the second. Today started 11 weeks, so just a few more weeks to go (don't even get me started on how 40 weeks makes 9 months?). I am happy to report though, that the never ending nausea seems to be easing (Yes, I did actually knock on fake manufactured wood as I typed that. I'm taking no chances here, people).
What doesn't seem to be easing? The never ending emotional ride. And I wish someone would give me and Tim a helmet for this stuff because it is not going to be easy. Especially if it gets worse, as people have warned me.
I'll give you a few examples of THE CRAZY that has been invading our household. (Hi TIM! Look, I'm telling other people about THE CRAZY so you know I'm not really mad at you, I'm just emotionally unbalanced!)
What doesn't seem to be easing? The never ending emotional ride. And I wish someone would give me and Tim a helmet for this stuff because it is not going to be easy. Especially if it gets worse, as people have warned me.
I'll give you a few examples of THE CRAZY that has been invading our household. (Hi TIM! Look, I'm telling other people about THE CRAZY so you know I'm not really mad at you, I'm just emotionally unbalanced!)
- Bursting into tears at a Chinese Buffet. While I dragged Tim to go to said buffet (Chinese not being his favorite) I then decided it was a WONDERFUL time to unload on him about not doing enough around the house (which I was SO JUSTIFIED in my head!). When questioned what he's not doing, (after he had just done laundry and cleaned and swept the living room) the examples I came up with included "Going grocery shopping" "reading the baby books" and my favorite "not telling me I look pretty 24/7." Note: These are all horrible examples for the following reasons:
- Tim has been a soldier for the past 6+ years of his life, living in barracks with food provided, or having all of his check to blow on daily fast food runs. His version of grocery shopping includes buying ramen noodles, apples, maybe some deli meat (but forgets bread) and cereal (sometimes remembering the milk). I have said I will soon teach him how to grocery shop (THEN tackle, you know, how to COOK) but have not yet done so. SO really, I'm not sure how I can expect him to do the grocery shopping in this case.
- Tim has read a few chapters in the baby book, but he also has 5 sisters and 10 nieces and nephews. Two of his sisters lived at home when he was growing up when they were pregnant, so the concept of a pregnant woman is not new to him. I also make it a point to tell him every new thing I read in the book... so really, what's the point in him reading the book himself?
- Tim does tell me I'm pretty. I choose to imagine he does so only when prompted or I choose to brush it aside. He told me I was glowing when we first saw the baby and my response was "you feel like you have to say that whether I was or wasn't." So, hmmm. Maybe I should stop complaining and listen more?
- Volunteering to pick up Tim's dress jacket from the alterations place on my way home from work yesterday, since I didn't want him to go on Wednesday after the doctor's appointment. I wanted him to go to my parent's house with me instead. And this dress jacket had to be done and picked up ASAP since it has to be dry cleaned before Monday. I KNEW all of this. This did not stop me from calling him up in a frenzy because OH MY GOD YOU HAVE MADE ME DRIVE TO THE GHETTO TO PICK THIS UP AND SCARY GUYS ARE LOOKING AT ME AT 4PM WHILE I'M IN MY CAR AND HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME.
- Ok. Maybe I knew to begin with the place he used (he still doesn't know Indy very well) was at the corner of Lafayette Rd and 38th Street. By an old run down mall we refer to as "Lafayette Scare" instead of Lafayette Square, and where they have bars on the store windows. And maybe, the place really isn't TERRIBLE, especially during the day, and is just 2 minutes out of my way on my drive home. STILL! HOW DARE HE MAKE ME VOLUNTEER TO GO THERE!
- Almost coming at him like a hormone crazed spider monkey when he very politely asked if one of the tubs of ice cream that I bought were for him. As in, asking if there was one he was specifically not to have. And in my mind he was TELLING me that he was going to eat all my ice cream and HOW DARE YOU DO THAT TO ME! And he ended up eating a very small bowl of ice cream in fear THE CRAZY would come find him in his sleep if he dared eat more.
- I actually bought the ice cream on impulse, not out of a craving. I figured eventually I would want ice cream and it'd be nice to have for those moments, but I was not knee deep in mint chocolate chip like a starving woman trying to fend off the animals from my life source. But... I guess I might've reacted like that.
That's all I've got for now. I'm sure more episodes of THE CRAZY will come up, and I will look back on them like I'm doing now and just cringe. I honestly wonder why that man hasn't started turning our guest bedroom into a mancave, or at least why he still agrees to sit in the same room with me. By the end of this I think he will deserve that newer TV he's been hinting for (but maybe not so much the gun he also wants... at least not until THE CRAZY is gone.)
Thursday, August 11, 2011
The one with Baby's First Picture
We had our first ultrasound yesterday!
It was wonderful to be able to see the baby, to hear its heart beat (a very healthy 165 bpm!), and know that everything is just fine for the little prune!
I won't even try to make any sarcastic comments about the moment, it was wonderful. Tim got a bit teary eyed when we first heard that heartbeat :)
Instead I will share the first picture with you and apologize for the quality. It was a 3D scan, printed on 2D paper, and then uploaded to a computer... so its gotten a little fuzzy in the mix... I added where the limbs are so you can know what you're looking at (since at 10 weeks it looks more like an alien then a baby :)).
We have our next appointment in September, and we can find out the sex of the baby starting at 16 weeks, so hopefully by the beginning of October we will know if its a boy or girl (and I can start shopping!)....
It was wonderful to be able to see the baby, to hear its heart beat (a very healthy 165 bpm!), and know that everything is just fine for the little prune!
I won't even try to make any sarcastic comments about the moment, it was wonderful. Tim got a bit teary eyed when we first heard that heartbeat :)
Instead I will share the first picture with you and apologize for the quality. It was a 3D scan, printed on 2D paper, and then uploaded to a computer... so its gotten a little fuzzy in the mix... I added where the limbs are so you can know what you're looking at (since at 10 weeks it looks more like an alien then a baby :)).
We have our next appointment in September, and we can find out the sex of the baby starting at 16 weeks, so hopefully by the beginning of October we will know if its a boy or girl (and I can start shopping!)....
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
The one with the Little Prune and the bible
So in my posts I've been referring to the living creature inside me (that's what Tim lovingly calls it as he's holding my hair back from the toilet and getting me water) as "Little Green Olive" and now, we have graduated to a Little Prune.
Now for those of you non-creature carrying ladies out there, you might not have heard of this book, but believe me, you will. It covers everything you ever need to know about pregnancy, broken down by weeks, and includes tips to deal with all the symptoms you find overcoming your body. It also has little tidbits... like... this Little Prune is going to have MASSIVE amounts of hair because apparently the more heartburn you have during pregnancy, the more hair your child will be born with. WHO KNEW!?
There's also a section for dads that explains THE CRAZY that will be going on in their partner for the next 9 months. Every few days I ask Tim if he's read the book yet (he loves that question, especially as he's trying to fall asleep!). I now completely understand Katherine Heigl's anger in "Knocked Up" when Seth Rogan didn't read the baby books! "I'm not crazy honey... just read the book... the author will be a completely non-biased third party that will tell you I'm not crazy and oh yeah how to be prepared for a baby too."
Now, ladies, if you don't want to take the time to read the very long book--never fear! There is a movie coming near you in 2012. The synopsis is "A look at the lives of four couples as they prepare to become parents"... ohhhhhh intriguing and never been done in Hollywood! BUT never fear, as there are many well-known names to add to this complicated plot to include Elizabeth Banks, Cameron Diaz, Jennifer Lopez, Dennis Quaid, Chris Rock, and Chase Crawford. You're salivating over that list aren't you?
I'm positive it will show every angle of pregnancy discussed in the book. Especially the chapters about varicose veins and constipation. And include the pictures that show the size of your uterus (now a grapefruit!).
But I digress, as I have read the book, but will probably still see the movie as it will undoubtedly be portrayed as a chick flick, and I usually don't miss a good chick flick!
Onto stuff the Little Prune did this week!
Last week, Tim and I went to eat at Red Lobster with my parents to celebrate his promotion at work.
Side Rant: actually, he's not officially promoted because its the Army and they make everything difficult. Basically his unit made him go in front of a bunch of commanders ("The Board") and answer questions to include being scrutinized down to the last button on his uniform, and in the end they recommended him to become an E-6 Staff Sergeant. (YAY!) But it's not that simple, unit! You must wait until 30 days are up AND THEN the soldier must have enough points! Ah, you might ask how you get the points and how many you need? Well the answer is that changes every single month so really you will never know in advance when you might actually make it. HA. We're the Army and we're here to help!
Anywho. We went to eat and as the all day nausea has still be just hanging around (so nice of it to spend my days with me. Just when I thought I would get lonely there it is!) and I THOUGHT I'd be safe with some steamed crab legs (PROTEIN! OMEGA 3! GOOD!) and regular broccoli, both without anything on them including butter. And we had a lovely time and a lovely meal and then I got home.
And the Little Prune DOES NOT LIKE SEA FOOD HOW DARE YOU TRY TO FEED ME THAT! And so that nice (expensive) dinner was not to be digested that night.
The next night, we went to BW3's with my sister and I tried the mini corn dogs and they stayed down! Yay! And Monday night I worked my agency's booth at the Indiana State Fair and had a pork sandwich and corn on the cob and it stayed down!
Then last night we went to get Chinese food because OMG FRIED RICE IS THE GREATEST THING EVER MADE AND I NEED TO EAT ALL OF IT NOW! Except. Little Prune does not like Chinese food. So it wasn't digested that night.
So based on these facts I have come to the conclusion that my Little Prune is a Redneck.
It hates seafood (that fancy stuff!), it definitely disagrees with Chinese (Where' the Amerrrrcan food?!) but LOVES fried, fatty foods (mmmm, where's the beer to wash it down!?). I can find no other reasoning for it.
So Little Prune, looks like we're going to be having some etiquette classes when you start having tea parties.
Monday, August 8, 2011
The one that's not so funny today...
Well, I'm not sure how witty or amusing today will be. I know I made big promises about not complaining... but today... today I need to vent a bit.
I'm feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed (and hormonal... HI HORMONES... glad you're still around!).
On a good day, I hate change. Ask my parents, they'll tell you how much I would enjoy the slightest mix up in my daily schedule (in elementary school I always watched Scooby Doo before school. So help anyone in that house if there was something wrong with the cable/we had to leave early/someone else was watching something you know, important). Now, I think I've gotten a bit better with change since meeting and marrying Tim, since at some point you just have to roll with the punches the Army throws at you. Mind you, this coming from the girl who chose to stay in Indianapolis and start my own career for the first year of marriage... so... yeah. Change = Bad.
Now throw in a baby in the mix. I think the only reason I haven't felt overwhelmed yet is because it wasn't quite real yet. It was still a novel thing, not much based in reality, and too many months down the road to worry about the big picture. That, and the fact that I was secure in the fact that Tim is non-deployable as a recruiter, and his recruiting tour is not up until 2015. But then he told me last night that he wants to become a Warrant Officer, basically the middle ground between enlisted and an officer, and become a pilot.
I was on board with this (and to be honest, he throws out ideas on what he wants to do next all the time--half the time he's staying in the Army, the other half he's getting out, joining US Marshalls or a local police dept, etc) as it is his career, and we wouldn't have to make any decisions for a few years yet and we'll decide then. But then he adds that a friend of his that was in his recruiting class in March/April had submitted a packet (you have to be picked for it) and was selected last month, and goes to Fort Rucker, AL to start the year + training in January. And that... is a 9 month time-frame. Not a 2 1/2-3 year time frame. And... I panicked.
Now, I know the hormones made the situation seem worse then it was, but at that moment I think I felt the need to cry, throw up and yell all at once. I understand the realities of the Army. I understand that when Tim comes down on orders, it is his duty to accept the orders and go where the Army needs him. I do NOT understand volunteering and leaving me alone with a newborn. In Tim's defense, that was not how he saw it but the sudden blinding reality that I will have a BABY, a living, breathing, survival-rests-on-me BABY in 6 months came crashing down on me... along with the thought that Oh My God I Can't Do This Alone!
Tim's answer, of course, was that I would come with him to Fort Rucker if/when he was selected. But... Tim has always been the single soldier when he's on orders to PCS or headed to a school. He didn't think through the fact that we now have a mortgage, a house that we can't just "get out of." We have 2 dogs that can't just stay with me in Indianapolis, they would have to come with us, which would require a new home to accommodate them. We would have a BABY, that would require a support network that we have in Indianapolis, that we would not have anywhere in Alabama. I have a job, that's in a very specific field that can't just be transferred. All these thoughts were rolling through my head, and he had just barely mentioned the idea of this.
Now, realistically I know that all these issues will have to be dealt with when and if he decides to stay in the Army and go back to Infantry after recruiting is done. As he reminded me, if he were deployed I would be doing it all alone as well... but that's 2015 and beyond and I still have TIME to filter through all of those pieces. We would have a toddler, not an infant, and the economy would have a few years to rebound so we might have a chance at selling our house. And most importantly, it would be the needs of the Army, not a volunteer packet submitted.
I think Tim was a bit overwhelmed himself at the emotion I threw at him (its not me! Its the Prune! The Prune is clearly my child and hates change as much as me!) and he just simply said, "Ok, I'll drop it." But the fact is that the reality has finally hit that I will have the responsibility of another life in 6 months. And 6 months... is not very long... at all. I feel like we just closed on our house, and that was 4 months ago. And in the 6 months, all the holidays will happen. I guess all these feelings are normal, that it has to hit everyone at some point. I think I would just prefer a point that it hit when my first reaction ISN'T to immediately start crying and stressed.
Because crying and stress just makes the little Prune upset. And when the Prune is upset... I get the pregnancy symptoms doubled. So... today I am going to try to work on calming myself down, on not panicking, and on putting some perspective on that thing called change.
And tomorrow I will try to be a little less whiny, a little more entertaining, and hope you stick around for the rest of the journey, with lots of changes I'm sure.
I'm feeling completely and utterly overwhelmed (and hormonal... HI HORMONES... glad you're still around!).
On a good day, I hate change. Ask my parents, they'll tell you how much I would enjoy the slightest mix up in my daily schedule (in elementary school I always watched Scooby Doo before school. So help anyone in that house if there was something wrong with the cable/we had to leave early/someone else was watching something you know, important). Now, I think I've gotten a bit better with change since meeting and marrying Tim, since at some point you just have to roll with the punches the Army throws at you. Mind you, this coming from the girl who chose to stay in Indianapolis and start my own career for the first year of marriage... so... yeah. Change = Bad.
Now throw in a baby in the mix. I think the only reason I haven't felt overwhelmed yet is because it wasn't quite real yet. It was still a novel thing, not much based in reality, and too many months down the road to worry about the big picture. That, and the fact that I was secure in the fact that Tim is non-deployable as a recruiter, and his recruiting tour is not up until 2015. But then he told me last night that he wants to become a Warrant Officer, basically the middle ground between enlisted and an officer, and become a pilot.
I was on board with this (and to be honest, he throws out ideas on what he wants to do next all the time--half the time he's staying in the Army, the other half he's getting out, joining US Marshalls or a local police dept, etc) as it is his career, and we wouldn't have to make any decisions for a few years yet and we'll decide then. But then he adds that a friend of his that was in his recruiting class in March/April had submitted a packet (you have to be picked for it) and was selected last month, and goes to Fort Rucker, AL to start the year + training in January. And that... is a 9 month time-frame. Not a 2 1/2-3 year time frame. And... I panicked.
Now, I know the hormones made the situation seem worse then it was, but at that moment I think I felt the need to cry, throw up and yell all at once. I understand the realities of the Army. I understand that when Tim comes down on orders, it is his duty to accept the orders and go where the Army needs him. I do NOT understand volunteering and leaving me alone with a newborn. In Tim's defense, that was not how he saw it but the sudden blinding reality that I will have a BABY, a living, breathing, survival-rests-on-me BABY in 6 months came crashing down on me... along with the thought that Oh My God I Can't Do This Alone!
Tim's answer, of course, was that I would come with him to Fort Rucker if/when he was selected. But... Tim has always been the single soldier when he's on orders to PCS or headed to a school. He didn't think through the fact that we now have a mortgage, a house that we can't just "get out of." We have 2 dogs that can't just stay with me in Indianapolis, they would have to come with us, which would require a new home to accommodate them. We would have a BABY, that would require a support network that we have in Indianapolis, that we would not have anywhere in Alabama. I have a job, that's in a very specific field that can't just be transferred. All these thoughts were rolling through my head, and he had just barely mentioned the idea of this.
Now, realistically I know that all these issues will have to be dealt with when and if he decides to stay in the Army and go back to Infantry after recruiting is done. As he reminded me, if he were deployed I would be doing it all alone as well... but that's 2015 and beyond and I still have TIME to filter through all of those pieces. We would have a toddler, not an infant, and the economy would have a few years to rebound so we might have a chance at selling our house. And most importantly, it would be the needs of the Army, not a volunteer packet submitted.
I think Tim was a bit overwhelmed himself at the emotion I threw at him (its not me! Its the Prune! The Prune is clearly my child and hates change as much as me!) and he just simply said, "Ok, I'll drop it." But the fact is that the reality has finally hit that I will have the responsibility of another life in 6 months. And 6 months... is not very long... at all. I feel like we just closed on our house, and that was 4 months ago. And in the 6 months, all the holidays will happen. I guess all these feelings are normal, that it has to hit everyone at some point. I think I would just prefer a point that it hit when my first reaction ISN'T to immediately start crying and stressed.
Because crying and stress just makes the little Prune upset. And when the Prune is upset... I get the pregnancy symptoms doubled. So... today I am going to try to work on calming myself down, on not panicking, and on putting some perspective on that thing called change.
And tomorrow I will try to be a little less whiny, a little more entertaining, and hope you stick around for the rest of the journey, with lots of changes I'm sure.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
The one with the story of us, and also SITCOMS LIE.
My husband is the youngest of 10 (8 living), 10 nieces and nephews, and twice as many "Extended" family members (close family friends) and THEIR kids. This can make for an...overwhelming meeting to say the least.
When my husband and I first started dating he was actually stationed in Iraq. We met through mutual friends (his best friend that he met in boot camp and was stationed with the 101st Airborne in Kentucky went to high school with me) and decided around January of 2008 (after many long hours of online talking, Skyping and late-night rushed phone calls from Iraq) to bite the bullet and "be" together... as much as you can across the world. I had not met his family (he was from North Carolina) or his friends, other then his best friend. Intimidating? Yes... but we both knew we really liked each other and we wouldn't let minor details like not knowing family or being in separate countries stop us. Again... this is typical of us.
SO fast forward to May of 2008, Tim was given his mid-tour leave and we planned to spend as much of the 2 weeks together as possible. It just so happened that he flew home on his birthday (April 26) which was the Saturday before finals (I was in college at the time--finishing up my Junior year) so I had to stay put at school. Which by the way was Ball State--home of the Garfield creator and David Letterman... and Oprah's "husband" Stedman. Does your school have those kinds of claims to fame? Yep... didn't think so! Anyway... when I finished my last test, I would fly to NC to spend a week there. After I met all his family/friends, we would fly back up to Indiana to meet all MY family and friends. It undoubtedly would be exhausting, but since his 15 month tour wouldn't be up until January of 2009, we decided it was important to get this part done with while we could.
If you caught that last part, you probably realized that he had yet to meet my family... aka my mom and dad. I am one of two pride and joys (and pain in asses :)) for my parents, and they TEND to be a little...protective. Not in a overbearing manner, just, we will definitely let you know how we feel about this and we do not approve kind of manner. They did not like the fact that I was flying to see him first before they met him. My mom had visions of the Craigslist killer (who serves in the Army in his spare time, and who's father is a preacher) whisking me away to some slum in North Carolina. It took many months to convince her and my dad (we won't even TOUCH the threats he gave!) that I would not be killed by a psycho killer in flying to NC first. I don't even USE Craigslist, MOM!
Well, I finished finals and headed to NC to see Tim, all the while promising my parents I would call the second I landed and stay on the phone with them until I met up with Tim and THEN hand the phone to Tim so he could very awkwardly reassure them I was alright before we even got to hug. Yes. That was fun. SO we got my bags and headed towards his hometown (Fayetteville, NC--home of Fort Bragg) so I could meet the clan.
One word to sum that all up: overwhelming. By the end of the first day I had broken down into tears because I had met 3 sisters, 4 "extended" sisters, two parents, 5+ nieces and nephews, all while juggling their daily adventures (someone's softball game, going to his parents house before running errands, etc) and it was just...overwhelming. They were a big, noisy, intimidating bunch, but there was so much love between all of them, I felt envious. And also... worried. Because I realized how comfortable Tim was with the children especially... and I am, shall we say, awkward around them.
Despite what my college roommate Beth will tell you, I really do LIKE children. Ok, ok, I might've made comments to her along those lines with the caveat "when they are behaved" but only because otherwise I have no idea how to interact with them! I was the youngest grandchild on my mom's side, so growing up I WAS the child. My dad's family had a couple kids younger then me, but they live in Chicago and Kansas, so we didn't get to see them often. And like I said earlier, I was one of two, just my older sister and myself. So... awkwardness ensued when around children.
BUT going back to children... I just need more time with them for me to feel less awkward--I'm sure of it (gulp)! I always wanted kids, I imagined Tim and I would have kids... and now, suddenly we are.
I haven't thought a lot about the months to come. I'm still trying to juggle how I'm going to take off work (my boss jokingly told me that early March wouldn't work for him, could I wait until May?) because we've got two huge exercises planned in March and April, and I'm actually the lead planner for the one in March. And my due date is March 9. So yes... I'm still trying just to figure out the schedule at work, let alone what will actually happen when I'm OFF work!
I do have to say though, that I have two of the BEST bosses to have right now. My immediate boss is a grandpa, who is months out from retirement, and enjoys telling the world about my pregnancy, because he is just so happy for me. The other boss (above him) is expecting his third child with his new wife, who also works with us, and they had their wedding a couple months after Tim and I, so we got to swap all our wedding planning stories and now we get to swap pregnancy stories. SO on this note, the pregnancy is going very well... again, couldn't ask for a better situation.
And its pretty good that they're so understanding because I have to tell you folks, the last 5 weeks have been BAD. Like... I feel irrational anger at Aunt Becky from Full House because she did not warn me what I would be facing BAD!
Now, when you see a movie or a TV show with a pregnant lady, it shows her running to the bathroom to throw up, making pithy comments about morning sickness, and then she is always in the next scene bright eyed and sunny and fine. AND THAT IS WRONG PEOPLE. When one of my favorite movies of all time was on TV Sunday on Lifetime, Father of the Bride II, I was SO HAPPY, I LOVE that movie! Then, they show the scene when Annie is pregnant in her first trimester, and they are arguing about the name of the baby, and she's sitting at the dinner table happily enjoying the meal, I actually called her a liar. Not just... you know... in my head. Out loud, to the TV, I called a fictional character a liar. That is the kind of hormonal craziness they do not show you. And also, they don't show when your two dogs start judging you because they look at you and I'm pretty sure they are saying "who are you talking to mom? You have not said any of the words we enjoy such as walk, treat or daycare. Also, you are angry. We don't understand anger, where is it coming from? Are you mad at us mom?"
And clearly, the fact that I typed that out, shows to my level of crazy.
Its not so much the bloating or fatigue that gets to me. Its not even the LOVELY constipation that NO ONE warns you about. Its not even the occasional throwing up that gets me. It's the non-stop, all day, can't get out of bed or concentrate on anything because I'm so consumed with this overwhelming nausea that gets me.
I have found little things here and there that seem to help, and all these coping mechanisms (peppermint candies, ice chips, lemonade, potato chips, saltines, water, sea bands accupressure wrist bands) seem to get me through the day. Its not pleasant, and I'm shocked at my own work ethic these days, but everyone has been really understanding. And poor Tim who was sent out one night to BUY ME SPAGHETTIOS... they are all that sound good right now and for the love of GOD I haven't eaten a full meal in about 3 weeks NEED SPAGHETTIOS and also Eggos while you're out please. So Tim buys the entire shelf (kid you not--it takes up half of a cabinet) because he doesn't know what will help but just wants to make the crazy lady stop!
So Tim (Even though you don't read this and am probably appalled I'm spilling the beans)... thank you for dealing with Crazy right now. Everyone says it gets better in the second trimester. But then again, this is the same "everyone" that doesn't tell you about all these other symptoms until you mention it and then its "oh yeah, I did deal with that" (MOM)... and also the same people that write lying sitcoms and movies.
So. Our Little Green Olive continues its journey...
When my husband and I first started dating he was actually stationed in Iraq. We met through mutual friends (his best friend that he met in boot camp and was stationed with the 101st Airborne in Kentucky went to high school with me) and decided around January of 2008 (after many long hours of online talking, Skyping and late-night rushed phone calls from Iraq) to bite the bullet and "be" together... as much as you can across the world. I had not met his family (he was from North Carolina) or his friends, other then his best friend. Intimidating? Yes... but we both knew we really liked each other and we wouldn't let minor details like not knowing family or being in separate countries stop us. Again... this is typical of us.
SO fast forward to May of 2008, Tim was given his mid-tour leave and we planned to spend as much of the 2 weeks together as possible. It just so happened that he flew home on his birthday (April 26) which was the Saturday before finals (I was in college at the time--finishing up my Junior year) so I had to stay put at school. Which by the way was Ball State--home of the Garfield creator and David Letterman... and Oprah's "husband" Stedman. Does your school have those kinds of claims to fame? Yep... didn't think so! Anyway... when I finished my last test, I would fly to NC to spend a week there. After I met all his family/friends, we would fly back up to Indiana to meet all MY family and friends. It undoubtedly would be exhausting, but since his 15 month tour wouldn't be up until January of 2009, we decided it was important to get this part done with while we could.
If you caught that last part, you probably realized that he had yet to meet my family... aka my mom and dad. I am one of two pride and joys (and pain in asses :)) for my parents, and they TEND to be a little...protective. Not in a overbearing manner, just, we will definitely let you know how we feel about this and we do not approve kind of manner. They did not like the fact that I was flying to see him first before they met him. My mom had visions of the Craigslist killer (who serves in the Army in his spare time, and who's father is a preacher) whisking me away to some slum in North Carolina. It took many months to convince her and my dad (we won't even TOUCH the threats he gave!) that I would not be killed by a psycho killer in flying to NC first. I don't even USE Craigslist, MOM!
Well, I finished finals and headed to NC to see Tim, all the while promising my parents I would call the second I landed and stay on the phone with them until I met up with Tim and THEN hand the phone to Tim so he could very awkwardly reassure them I was alright before we even got to hug. Yes. That was fun. SO we got my bags and headed towards his hometown (Fayetteville, NC--home of Fort Bragg) so I could meet the clan.
One word to sum that all up: overwhelming. By the end of the first day I had broken down into tears because I had met 3 sisters, 4 "extended" sisters, two parents, 5+ nieces and nephews, all while juggling their daily adventures (someone's softball game, going to his parents house before running errands, etc) and it was just...overwhelming. They were a big, noisy, intimidating bunch, but there was so much love between all of them, I felt envious. And also... worried. Because I realized how comfortable Tim was with the children especially... and I am, shall we say, awkward around them.
Despite what my college roommate Beth will tell you, I really do LIKE children. Ok, ok, I might've made comments to her along those lines with the caveat "when they are behaved" but only because otherwise I have no idea how to interact with them! I was the youngest grandchild on my mom's side, so growing up I WAS the child. My dad's family had a couple kids younger then me, but they live in Chicago and Kansas, so we didn't get to see them often. And like I said earlier, I was one of two, just my older sister and myself. So... awkwardness ensued when around children.
BUT going back to children... I just need more time with them for me to feel less awkward--I'm sure of it (gulp)! I always wanted kids, I imagined Tim and I would have kids... and now, suddenly we are.
I haven't thought a lot about the months to come. I'm still trying to juggle how I'm going to take off work (my boss jokingly told me that early March wouldn't work for him, could I wait until May?) because we've got two huge exercises planned in March and April, and I'm actually the lead planner for the one in March. And my due date is March 9. So yes... I'm still trying just to figure out the schedule at work, let alone what will actually happen when I'm OFF work!
I do have to say though, that I have two of the BEST bosses to have right now. My immediate boss is a grandpa, who is months out from retirement, and enjoys telling the world about my pregnancy, because he is just so happy for me. The other boss (above him) is expecting his third child with his new wife, who also works with us, and they had their wedding a couple months after Tim and I, so we got to swap all our wedding planning stories and now we get to swap pregnancy stories. SO on this note, the pregnancy is going very well... again, couldn't ask for a better situation.
And its pretty good that they're so understanding because I have to tell you folks, the last 5 weeks have been BAD. Like... I feel irrational anger at Aunt Becky from Full House because she did not warn me what I would be facing BAD!
Now, when you see a movie or a TV show with a pregnant lady, it shows her running to the bathroom to throw up, making pithy comments about morning sickness, and then she is always in the next scene bright eyed and sunny and fine. AND THAT IS WRONG PEOPLE. When one of my favorite movies of all time was on TV Sunday on Lifetime, Father of the Bride II, I was SO HAPPY, I LOVE that movie! Then, they show the scene when Annie is pregnant in her first trimester, and they are arguing about the name of the baby, and she's sitting at the dinner table happily enjoying the meal, I actually called her a liar. Not just... you know... in my head. Out loud, to the TV, I called a fictional character a liar. That is the kind of hormonal craziness they do not show you. And also, they don't show when your two dogs start judging you because they look at you and I'm pretty sure they are saying "who are you talking to mom? You have not said any of the words we enjoy such as walk, treat or daycare. Also, you are angry. We don't understand anger, where is it coming from? Are you mad at us mom?"
WE ARE JUDGING YOU! (or Sleeping)
And clearly, the fact that I typed that out, shows to my level of crazy.
Its not so much the bloating or fatigue that gets to me. Its not even the LOVELY constipation that NO ONE warns you about. Its not even the occasional throwing up that gets me. It's the non-stop, all day, can't get out of bed or concentrate on anything because I'm so consumed with this overwhelming nausea that gets me.
I have found little things here and there that seem to help, and all these coping mechanisms (peppermint candies, ice chips, lemonade, potato chips, saltines, water, sea bands accupressure wrist bands) seem to get me through the day. Its not pleasant, and I'm shocked at my own work ethic these days, but everyone has been really understanding. And poor Tim who was sent out one night to BUY ME SPAGHETTIOS... they are all that sound good right now and for the love of GOD I haven't eaten a full meal in about 3 weeks NEED SPAGHETTIOS and also Eggos while you're out please. So Tim buys the entire shelf (kid you not--it takes up half of a cabinet) because he doesn't know what will help but just wants to make the crazy lady stop!
So Tim (Even though you don't read this and am probably appalled I'm spilling the beans)... thank you for dealing with Crazy right now. Everyone says it gets better in the second trimester. But then again, this is the same "everyone" that doesn't tell you about all these other symptoms until you mention it and then its "oh yeah, I did deal with that" (MOM)... and also the same people that write lying sitcoms and movies.
So. Our Little Green Olive continues its journey...
Monday, August 1, 2011
The one with the long story...
I have finally done it... I have caved and joined the blog world. I'm not sure how this is all going to turn out (or even how often I will remember to update) but... I am making an attempt (HI CHELSEA!).
I am going to lay out the one ground rule I think I will need, and have to remind myself of:
I WILL NOT ENDLESSLY COMPLAIN ON THIS BLOG.
It seems like that would be the easiest thing to do these days, however I will try to come up with something witty, amusing or even slightly remotely funny to offset the whining (hey, I said TRY).
The other rule I will TRY to follow will be:
DO NOT GROSS OUT READERS OF THIS BLOG WITH PREGNANCY TMI.
Because, the reason of all that complaining, is the tiny little Green Olive (approx. 1 inch in size) growing inside me currently. I am 9 weeks pregnant with my first child, and experiencing the never ending JOYS of this journey (sarcasm isn't really complaining, right?).
On today's post boys and girls, I will start with a little background...
My husband Tim and I got married on April 23, 2010. If you ask my mother, however, that date is not valid and we were actually married October 16, 2010. And I guess my mother has a point, as we decided to secretly elope in April without telling any family or friends....and it just HAPPENED to be on her birthday... MINOR DETAILS. Needless to say whether it was by a Muscogee County Judge (oh that's right... classy Fort Benning, GA, because they NEVER see elopements with soldiers at that courthouse. We were the 4th wedding that Friday morning!) or by my father-in-law, we are bound together for life.
Now, another MINOR DETAIL is the fact that Tim is active duty Army. Those of you who know me know how WELL I do with not being in control, just leaving it all up to the government to decide for me, and not having any say in the direction my life will head in the next 3, 5, 10 years. So, I fought. I decided to stay in Indianapolis after we were married, even though it meant we would spend the first year of our marriage apart; I fought to establish my career in the meantime in state government, and try to find my own way in the world. I fought to make the Army bend to my will (YEAH... RIGHT) by fighting the system, and I lost. I'm not sure if you all know this, but the Army is a big machine. And just because one Army wife is complaining that they haven't gotten their travel pay for moving expenses in the allotted time frame, doesn't mean anyone has to...care. It is the Army and it does what it wants.
I have given up fighting the Army. It is a bigger beast then I, and also I was warned that commanders do not like wives who meddle. So. Anyway. Back to life in military-base-free Indiana :).
Around October of 2010 (wedding time!) we found out that Tim came down on recruiter orders. He had put in to be a voluntary recruiter back in 2009, when he was stationed at Fort Campbell, KY, and instead got orders to go to Fort Benning, GA. We figured the Benning orders cancelled out the recruiter packet and promptly forgot all about it. Tim had roughly 2 years left in the army at Fort Benning, so we would just survive those two years, and then he could get out and move to Indy. But alas, the Army knows and remembers all. So he re-enlisted for 3 more years to accept the orders, and we waited for the ball to drop on where he would go.
His first assignment he was told was the Indianapolis Battalion (YAY!)... but then he would told the actual city would be Vincennes (BOOO!) which is about 2 1/2 hours south of Indianapolis, where I worked and lived, and that commute is just not going to work. Well, that same day Tim was able to call the headquarters, explain that we were buying a house in Indianapolis (a little premature--we were just looking at that point) and could he be stationed closer. AND THEY DID. The first time the Army has ever worked in our favor, and I couldn't be happier. His recruiting station is about 25 miles from our recently purchased (shhhhh! not THAT recent if the Army asks!) first home!
SO... we moved into our first home in late May, and promptly started tearing the place up (more to come on that later!). We were blissfully enjoying the married life, learning how to live with each other for the first time with shared responsibilities and hurdles (and dogs... can't forget our pups!)... and then... it happened... the POSITIVE TEST.
Now, I would love to tell you what a cute, shared, poignant moment that was for Tim and I... but, like most other things in our lives... it was very... not. Cute and poignant that is.
Months and months ago, BEFORE 2011 STARTED, I had an HSA (Health Savings Acct) from my employer that due to new laws, could no longer be used for over-the-counter medications. Well I also had a few hundred dollars in this account since I hadn't had many doctor's visits that year, and I was starting on the military's insurance TRICARE at the first of the year, and I wouldn't be able to use the HSA. So Tim and I set out one new years eve to blow a few hundred dollars on over the counter meds, and THAT didn't get me flagged or anything.
After maxing out my Sudafed-buying abilities, I had to turn to alternative medicines that weren't, you know, meth ingredients, least I find myself part of some Channel 13 drug investigation. So naturally, I turned to pregnancy tests and bought one (or 2, or 3) of every brand, basically, and considered myself stocked for life (and probably a VERY worried cashier... HI cashier, I just like to give these out as... uh... parting gifts... that's why I need 3 years worth!).
SO going back to THE TEST... needless to say I had every variety imaginable under that bathroom sink. Well a few days before THAT TIME OF THE MONTH THAT MUST NOT BE MENTIONED BY GUYS AROUND THE WORLD, I started to feel "off" like something just wasn't right... I wasn't getting my normal cravings to eat everything in sight around me, I wasn't feeling like my pants were tighter, etc. I know Friday was THE day, and by Tuesday I was curious. When I got home from work, I figured I'd test out one of those suckers and went about my business waiting for the results, expecting a big fat NO and feeling justified in my massive pregnancy-test-buying-spree (LOOK! I used one within the first year!). Except... there was something there. Not a HOLY CRAP YOU'RE PREGNANT, PREGGO kind of there, more of a very subtle, you're mind is playing tricks on you, go scour the internet for every site you can find about false positives and evaporation lines kind of THERE.
Well, of course Tim was working late that day, so I immediately start texting him and pestering him about when he would be home. I had not told him my suspicions or plans to take a test, so he had no idea why all the sudden I need him to be home NOW. So I waited for him to come home (while still surfing the ever-informative internet on sites like peeonastick.com... yes... it's real!) to get his opinion. And, like any normal wife, I made him come to the bathroom before he even took off his coat to show him THE TEST. And... this is where the typical-us comes out... he basically called me a crazy lady who was just desperate for a baby.
OK Maybe that's not what he said, he MIGHT'VE said something like "I don't really see anything there, but I guess we can check tomorrow" and in my head it just sounded SO ACCUSATORY. So, naturally, I ignored him the rest of the night because I AM NOT CRAZY AND WE WILL SEE TOMORROW!
SO the next day, I decided again to wait until I got home from work (why? I have no clue) and took two more tests... this time the FIRST RESULT WE WILL TELL YOU 2 MINUTES AFTER YOU CONCEIVE IF IT HAPPENED BECAUSE YOU ARE WILLING TO PAY $20 FOR A TEST test, and the digital THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND HERE BUDDY test.
And guess what? Both said "PREGNANT" in big loud pink and digital ways and there was just no mistaking. So I, like any sweet wife who just finds out this wonderful news and wants to surprise her husband do the only natural thing--I take a picture, TEXT IT TO HIM AT WORK with the caption "Still don't see a line?!"
Now... in retrospect... maybe not the best time to hold a grudge or a way to break the news. But hey... it works for us because his response was "The blue (digital) one doesn't have a line!" And thus begins the journey of this little Green Olive growing inside me, which I will try not to complain about but will instead update you will all the wonderful hurdles on this journey.
And thanks for sticking with me til the end. I promise I'll try not to be so wordy next time :)
I am going to lay out the one ground rule I think I will need, and have to remind myself of:
I WILL NOT ENDLESSLY COMPLAIN ON THIS BLOG.
It seems like that would be the easiest thing to do these days, however I will try to come up with something witty, amusing or even slightly remotely funny to offset the whining (hey, I said TRY).
The other rule I will TRY to follow will be:
DO NOT GROSS OUT READERS OF THIS BLOG WITH PREGNANCY TMI.
Because, the reason of all that complaining, is the tiny little Green Olive (approx. 1 inch in size) growing inside me currently. I am 9 weeks pregnant with my first child, and experiencing the never ending JOYS of this journey (sarcasm isn't really complaining, right?).
On today's post boys and girls, I will start with a little background...
My husband Tim and I got married on April 23, 2010. If you ask my mother, however, that date is not valid and we were actually married October 16, 2010. And I guess my mother has a point, as we decided to secretly elope in April without telling any family or friends....and it just HAPPENED to be on her birthday... MINOR DETAILS. Needless to say whether it was by a Muscogee County Judge (oh that's right... classy Fort Benning, GA, because they NEVER see elopements with soldiers at that courthouse. We were the 4th wedding that Friday morning!) or by my father-in-law, we are bound together for life.
Now, another MINOR DETAIL is the fact that Tim is active duty Army. Those of you who know me know how WELL I do with not being in control, just leaving it all up to the government to decide for me, and not having any say in the direction my life will head in the next 3, 5, 10 years. So, I fought. I decided to stay in Indianapolis after we were married, even though it meant we would spend the first year of our marriage apart; I fought to establish my career in the meantime in state government, and try to find my own way in the world. I fought to make the Army bend to my will (YEAH... RIGHT) by fighting the system, and I lost. I'm not sure if you all know this, but the Army is a big machine. And just because one Army wife is complaining that they haven't gotten their travel pay for moving expenses in the allotted time frame, doesn't mean anyone has to...care. It is the Army and it does what it wants.
I have given up fighting the Army. It is a bigger beast then I, and also I was warned that commanders do not like wives who meddle. So. Anyway. Back to life in military-base-free Indiana :).
Around October of 2010 (wedding time!) we found out that Tim came down on recruiter orders. He had put in to be a voluntary recruiter back in 2009, when he was stationed at Fort Campbell, KY, and instead got orders to go to Fort Benning, GA. We figured the Benning orders cancelled out the recruiter packet and promptly forgot all about it. Tim had roughly 2 years left in the army at Fort Benning, so we would just survive those two years, and then he could get out and move to Indy. But alas, the Army knows and remembers all. So he re-enlisted for 3 more years to accept the orders, and we waited for the ball to drop on where he would go.
His first assignment he was told was the Indianapolis Battalion (YAY!)... but then he would told the actual city would be Vincennes (BOOO!) which is about 2 1/2 hours south of Indianapolis, where I worked and lived, and that commute is just not going to work. Well, that same day Tim was able to call the headquarters, explain that we were buying a house in Indianapolis (a little premature--we were just looking at that point) and could he be stationed closer. AND THEY DID. The first time the Army has ever worked in our favor, and I couldn't be happier. His recruiting station is about 25 miles from our recently purchased (shhhhh! not THAT recent if the Army asks!) first home!
SO... we moved into our first home in late May, and promptly started tearing the place up (more to come on that later!). We were blissfully enjoying the married life, learning how to live with each other for the first time with shared responsibilities and hurdles (and dogs... can't forget our pups!)... and then... it happened... the POSITIVE TEST.
Now, I would love to tell you what a cute, shared, poignant moment that was for Tim and I... but, like most other things in our lives... it was very... not. Cute and poignant that is.
Months and months ago, BEFORE 2011 STARTED, I had an HSA (Health Savings Acct) from my employer that due to new laws, could no longer be used for over-the-counter medications. Well I also had a few hundred dollars in this account since I hadn't had many doctor's visits that year, and I was starting on the military's insurance TRICARE at the first of the year, and I wouldn't be able to use the HSA. So Tim and I set out one new years eve to blow a few hundred dollars on over the counter meds, and THAT didn't get me flagged or anything.
After maxing out my Sudafed-buying abilities, I had to turn to alternative medicines that weren't, you know, meth ingredients, least I find myself part of some Channel 13 drug investigation. So naturally, I turned to pregnancy tests and bought one (or 2, or 3) of every brand, basically, and considered myself stocked for life (and probably a VERY worried cashier... HI cashier, I just like to give these out as... uh... parting gifts... that's why I need 3 years worth!).
SO going back to THE TEST... needless to say I had every variety imaginable under that bathroom sink. Well a few days before THAT TIME OF THE MONTH THAT MUST NOT BE MENTIONED BY GUYS AROUND THE WORLD, I started to feel "off" like something just wasn't right... I wasn't getting my normal cravings to eat everything in sight around me, I wasn't feeling like my pants were tighter, etc. I know Friday was THE day, and by Tuesday I was curious. When I got home from work, I figured I'd test out one of those suckers and went about my business waiting for the results, expecting a big fat NO and feeling justified in my massive pregnancy-test-buying-spree (LOOK! I used one within the first year!). Except... there was something there. Not a HOLY CRAP YOU'RE PREGNANT, PREGGO kind of there, more of a very subtle, you're mind is playing tricks on you, go scour the internet for every site you can find about false positives and evaporation lines kind of THERE.
Well, of course Tim was working late that day, so I immediately start texting him and pestering him about when he would be home. I had not told him my suspicions or plans to take a test, so he had no idea why all the sudden I need him to be home NOW. So I waited for him to come home (while still surfing the ever-informative internet on sites like peeonastick.com... yes... it's real!) to get his opinion. And, like any normal wife, I made him come to the bathroom before he even took off his coat to show him THE TEST. And... this is where the typical-us comes out... he basically called me a crazy lady who was just desperate for a baby.
OK Maybe that's not what he said, he MIGHT'VE said something like "I don't really see anything there, but I guess we can check tomorrow" and in my head it just sounded SO ACCUSATORY. So, naturally, I ignored him the rest of the night because I AM NOT CRAZY AND WE WILL SEE TOMORROW!
SO the next day, I decided again to wait until I got home from work (why? I have no clue) and took two more tests... this time the FIRST RESULT WE WILL TELL YOU 2 MINUTES AFTER YOU CONCEIVE IF IT HAPPENED BECAUSE YOU ARE WILLING TO PAY $20 FOR A TEST test, and the digital THERE IS NO MIDDLE GROUND HERE BUDDY test.
And guess what? Both said "PREGNANT" in big loud pink and digital ways and there was just no mistaking. So I, like any sweet wife who just finds out this wonderful news and wants to surprise her husband do the only natural thing--I take a picture, TEXT IT TO HIM AT WORK with the caption "Still don't see a line?!"
Now... in retrospect... maybe not the best time to hold a grudge or a way to break the news. But hey... it works for us because his response was "The blue (digital) one doesn't have a line!" And thus begins the journey of this little Green Olive growing inside me, which I will try not to complain about but will instead update you will all the wonderful hurdles on this journey.
And thanks for sticking with me til the end. I promise I'll try not to be so wordy next time :)
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